Twinkle Twinkle Little Star

Once upon a time there was a little girl named Kelly who lived with her mom, dad, and dog (a Husky named Bandit). Kelly loved that her mom stayed at home and didn't have to work, that she was always able to have play dates with friends after preschool and/or on non-school days, that he dog loved to play with her in the backyard, and that weekends were "daddy time". However, what she didn't know was that there was a deep longing on her parents behalf to give her something special...a sibling. Because she was only 5 years old, Kelly didn’t realize that her mom and dad had been though much heartache and had given up all hope at ever being able to give Kelly that special gift.

When Kelly began Kindergarten in the fall of 1990, it seemed fitting that her mom would return to work, especially with the towns option for extended day Kindergarten (1/2 day of normal class, 1/2 day of 'Play-And-Learn'). Initially, Kelly was devastated that she was loosing her 'mommy time', but after she realized that each new school year would mean clothes shopping and a cool nee lunchbox, she realized that school wouldn't be so bad. Kelly made lots of friends and added them to her list of " play date peeps". Plus she was looking forward to the big vacations...the ski trip in February and trip to Disneyland in August!

The school year was rapidly passing by. Christmas had come and gone and the big Ski vacation in February was fast approaching. However, 2 weeks before the big trip, Kelly got the news that the trip was "changed" and that the family would only be going to the mountains overnight, not for the entire week. Being a typical egocentric kid, Kelly whined and said, "But whhhyyyyyyyyyy???? It’s not fair..........." Her parents just said, "I'm sorry, but there are some things that are out of our control. We'll do something fun another time."

A few weeks passed and the very first signs of spring were beginning to peep though. March had truly come in like a lion, and out like a lamb. Kelly got off the bus one cool, but sunny Friday afternoon and noticed that her dad was home early from work. "Yay!", Kelly thought. She ran up the driveway, skort flapping in the breeze and backpack bouncing on her back, and bolted onto the porch where her mom and dad were standing. "Hi Dad! What are you doing home??"

"Come on in and take a seat, Kel, We have something to tell you."
"Did you get me a new bike?," she asked. (She had clearly outgrown my old one and had no sense that big gifts like that were for birthdays and Christmas...not random Fridays)
"No, sorry Kelly. No bike. Here look at this."
She made one of the, "You have got to be kidding me faces" and said, "What's this??"
Kelly's parents said, "It's a picture."
Kelly said, "Well what is it? It looks ugly"
"Well Kelly, that's your new baby brother or sister. Mom is going to have a baby"
"Oh no!!" Kelly screeched. "You mean I am going to have to share my things?!?!?!"

Not quite the response they had been hoping for, Kelly's parents were crushed. They had waited until 15 weeks to tell Kelly their news. Actually, they had waited until 12 weeks to even tell their families. After 2 previous late losses (neither of which Kelly had been aware of) they couldn't stand the thought/pain of having to tell their only daughter that the baby actually wasn't going to be coming...

That night, as Kelly was being tucked into bed she said, "Mom? Dad? It’s okay. A baby will be fine. Just don't let it cry or make smelly poops. Then I'll be happy."

As the weeks passed and Kelly's mom's belly grew bigger and bigger, and as family and friends talked about the subject more and more, Kelly grew excited about the prospective new member of the family. However, when August rolled around and Kelly said, "So when are we going to Disney?" her parents said, "Oh Kelly, We're sorry. We can’t go to Disney now...Mommy can't fly." "WHAT?!?!?!," she wailed. "But don’t worry, we are going to Hershey Park and Sesame Place in Pennsylvania instead and Katie and Brian and Aunty Linda and Billy are coming too!" "Oh, well...Okay..."

The trip came and went and Kelly had a blast. She started first grade and was finally back into the groove. However, one Thursday morning when she awoke, it wasn't mom and dad in their bed...it was Aunnie.
"Where's my mom and dad?, " Kelly asked.
"Mom went to the hospital last night. She's having the baby, "Aunnie said.
"Ohhhhh, okay. Will she be here when I get home?"
"I don’t think so, but dad will pick you up from school and then you can go visit her."

Kelly ran down the hall and got dressed ( oh how she loved school days when she could wear whatever she wanted...that day's outfit of choice was a red plaid skirt with Scotty dog sweater and striped knee socks and saddle shoes with an enormous red bow headband atop her mop of unbrushed curls).
As Kelly was getting ready to get the bus, the phone rang. It was mom, calling to let her know that she had a baby sister...Colleen!

At that moment, the past 5 months of resentment and jealousy disappeared. Gone was the whining and complaining about things not being fair...she had a new sister!

Kelly left for school and got picked up by her dad that afternoon to go see mom and Colleen. Aside from the sheer look of horror on her mom’s face at the outfit Kelly was wearing, the first union of the new family of four was a success.

"Can I hold her?, "Kelly asked. "Of course you can. Sit in the chair and hold out your arms. Okay, support her head. There you go, very good."
And then Kelly began to sing, "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star....How I wonder what you are....."

That little girl named Kelly is me, and I cannot believe that that day occurred 16 years ago. This Thursday, 9/27 is my little sister's 16th birthday. I cannot believe how fast the time has passed, what an amazing young woman she has become, and how thankful I am to have someone as special as her in my life.
It’s hard to imagine what my life would be without her. Although there is a large age difference between us, we are now becoming the best of friends. It wasn't until I left for college that I realized how big of a part she is in my life; however, since having moved into the *real* working world, I know realize how big of apart we are in each others lives. We have finally reached the point in our relationship where we can call and leave each other random phone messages just to tell the other one about something stilly/dumb that happened during the day, or to check in on the other one's sanity (oh the drama of 10th grade and the reality of being a nurse), or even just to call and say, "I love you! Miss ya!"

I dedicate this post to my sister. without her I wouldn’t be who I am today and (despite a rocky start) I am so thankful that she is a part of my life and no, I really don't mind having to "share my stuff" with her.

Happy 16th Birthday Colleen! I love you.

W.I.U.W. part II

Here we go! Week number two....I'd love to hear any feedback on last week's recipes!!

Tomato Avacado Salsa

One 15-ounce container purchased salsa
1 diced medium avocado
1 tablespoon fresh lime juice
1 tablespoon olive oil
3 tablespoons finely chopped cilantro
Salt and pepper


Mix salsa with avocado, lime juice, olive oil, and chopped cilantro. Season with salt and pepper; chill until ready to serve.

*Excellent topping for cooked rice
**My fellow Vegeterians...add some cooked, cubed Tofu
**For all those meat eaters out there...add some cubed chicken


Cherry-Almond Granola
4 cups old-fashioned rolled oats
2 cups sweetened, shredded coconut
2 cups sliced almonds
1 1/2 cups dried cherries, chopped
1/2 cup vegetable oil
1/3 cup good honey
2 teaspoons ground cinnamon

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
Toss the oats, coconut, almonds, and cherries together in a large bowl. Pour the vegetable oil and honey over the oat mixture. Add the cinnamon, and stir with a wooden spoon until all the oats and nuts are coated with the liquids. Pour onto a sheet pan. Bake, stirring occasionally with a spatula, until the mixture turns a nice, even golden brown, about 25 to 30 minutes.
Remove the granola from the oven and allow to cool, stirring occasionally. Store the cooled granola in an airtight container.



Apple, Sausage, Turkey Stuffing
INGREDIENTS
1 1/2 cups cubed whole wheat bread
3 3/4 cups cubed white bread
1 pound ground turkey sausage
1 cup chopped onion
3/4 cup chopped celery
2 1/2 teaspoons dried sage
1 1/2 teaspoons dried rosemary
1/2 teaspoon dried thyme
1 Golden Delicious apple, cored and chopped
3/4 cup dried cranberries
1/3 cup minced fresh parsley
1 cooked turkey liver, finely chopped
3/4 cup turkey stock
4 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted

DIRECTIONS
Preheat oven to 350 degree F (175 degree C). Spread the white and whole wheat bread cubes in a single layer on a large baking sheet. Bake for 5 to 7 minutes in the preheated oven, or until evenly toasted. Transfer toasted bread cubes to a large bowl.

In a large skillet, cook the sausage and onions over medium heat, stirring and breaking up the lumps until evenly browned. Add the celery, sage, rosemary, and thyme; cook, stirring, for 2 minutes to blend flavors.

Pour sausage mixture over bread in bowl. Mix in chopped apples, dried cranberries, parsley, and liver. Drizzle with turkey stock and melted butter, and mix lightly. Spoon into turkey to loosely fill.

Riding In Style

In Beverly Hills, Hollywood, Miami, South Beach, people drive around in style. There are no shortages of “it” cars. It’s about as common to see a Bentley cruising on the smooth black asphalt, as it is to see a minivan is New England suburbia.

But in New York (despite a comparable number of equally wealthy people) it’s the babies that ride in style. Yes my loyal readers, this place is the baby stroller capital of the country!

I used to think the Greico was a top of the line stroller, than a few years ago I was introduced to the “yuppier” jogger strollers (I must admit, they are very easy to use- great for parents who want to stay fit and spend time with their kids while doing so). Then I was introduced to the MacLaren...also very chic and it pushes quite smoothly; however, since I’ve been in the big apple, I have seen strollers that probably cost more than my monthly rent!

So what have I seen so far?

Exhibit A) Double stroller where the infant is in a deluxe bassinet on top, and the toddler rides low to the ground facing the direction they are being pushed. (they have their own cup-holder and toy storage pack)

Exhibit B) you know those little side cars that attach to a side of a motorcycle, well picture one of those on each side on a shopping/grocery cart.

Exhibit C) A front facing child seat with a standing ledge in the rear for the older child.

Exhibit D) The triple stroller that is slanted upward. the heaviest kid rides on the bottom and the lighter on the top...each level has a tray in front with a cup holder, snack compartment, and oh yeah, battery powered mini fans. (I sear, I'm not kidding! I did a double take when I first saw it

Exhibit E) The stroller that looks more like a highchair on a video tripod stand, but with bicycle handle bards to push it.

Looking back on all of this, it just seems crazy! innovative! outrageously elaborate!!!

The stroller that I was carted around in? Well, it's safe to say that it's been long done for many years, probably rotting in a landfill somewhere.

Oh well, I guess it just goes to show you that 'time are a changin' and the kiddos are not going to be left beind!

Bubbly Delight

I’ve wanted to write this post for a while, but it seems that every time I sit down to write, I loose my train of thought/cannot find the write words/end up with one really long incoherent run-on sentence→paragraph→page.

Alas, I am going to give this a final shot.

8 Weeks, 3 days, 2 hours, and 42 minutes ago, I stopped drinking soda.

For those of you who didn’t know, I was a diet soda fiend. There was just something so crisp and refreshing about cracking open a soda and feeling those million little bubbles zing all over my mouth and go down my esophagus with ease. (Cleary, I have given this a great deal of thought).

I would have to say that my soda habit got worse when I went to college. There was just something about having the diet Pepsi fountain write next to the milk and orange juice that made it seem acceptable to drink this bubbly delight morning, noon, and night. Oh yeah, plus I had about a bazillion dining dollars that I had to use my freshman year, and it ‘made sense’ to stock up soda (iahhem, mixers) and use the money up. Okay, so that was my excuse freshman year.

My excuse sophomore year? Well I lived in my sorority house. 22 girls….enough said.
One would think that when I moved off campus junior year and no longer had a meal plan or a chef, and would have to lug cases of soda multiple blocks to my house from the store, that I would have cut back. But no! The habit endured.

However, my habit reached it’s all time worst the summer entering my senior year. I didn’t move home for the summer, but rather stayed in Philly to work. In addition to my job at the hospital, I also was babysitting- a lot. Thus, my parents thought it was justified that I have my car in Philly so I could travel back and forth to the ‘burns to baby-sit. Aside from the amazing families that I saw on my at least 3x weekly trips to Delaware County, I also passed the amazing Tar-zhay, the ACME, the Genaurdis, etc. Are you getting where I am going with this? Oh yeah, I was stocking up and hitting the soda sales. I was truly amazed that you could get 4 12-packs for $10; at the grocery store near school, the bubbly delight was at least $5.59/pack. And thus, the habit endured. Now don’t judge me for this, but one day I counted and I drank 8 cans . Thank g0d it was diet, otherwise in addition to a beverage habit, I would’ve needed an entirely new wardrobe!

Flash-forward to July 2007 when I was getting ready for my move to the Big Apple.

One night, while my family was away on their tropical vacation and I was home with the dog, I made my dinner and had my 5th soda for the day. I was slipping through the channels and saw the infomercial for some tooth whitener. I didn’t give it much thought, my mom’s in the dental field, but I guess the infomercial did something to me. I awoke that night in a cold sweat that all of my tooth enamel had worn off and that I was going to need dentures to replace my teeth that were so badly ruined by the bubbly beverages I indulged in.
I have not had even a sip of the stuff since then. Although I know my dream was not quite realistic, it just got me thinking…the soda wasn’t good for my teeth or my bones. The fizz sucks the calcium out of your bones, the artificial sweeteners clearly aren’t that good for your long term health, and let’s face it…..at 7.00 for a 12 pack of soda in New York, the stuff really wasn’t good for my wallet either..

It’s interesting that when I drank that last soda, I didn’t know that it would be my last. I didn’t take the time to savior the bubbles, the crispness, etc. I sort of feel like an addict or alcoholic who is on that show INTERVENTION and gets whisked off to treatment, not knowing that their last drink and/or hit was their last. However, looking back on this experience I realized that quitting cold turkey was the way to go. There was no dread, no hesitation, it was quick and painless (well aside from the headaches I had during the first few weeks).

So what do I drink now? Soymilk (8th Continent Light Soymilk
), Crystal Light “To-Go” packs, and water. I also decided to give up caffeine, so it’s now very rare that I even chose to drink coffee or tea.

In summation (oh how my English teachers used to tear apart any concluding paragraph that ended this way), I’d just like to put in on the record that yes folks, my name is Kelly and I’m a recovering soda-holic.

Whip It Up Wednesdays

New York is such a gluttonous city. Not just with those in the upper echelon, but with everyone. gluttony surrounds the lifestyle, the nightlife, the retail market, and last but certainly nor least....the food.
I have been making up recipes left and right, but I can't keep up with trying them all out.

A) I'm not home enough;

B) more than 1/2 of them involve things that cluck, moo, baa, gobble, or oink- so I'm off the taster panel;

C) My roomate's on a diet;

D) the food would spoil before I could eat it all....

So here is my plan: I'll post a few new recipes on Wednesdays (all courses, varying cuisines, both unique and common interests). Please feel free to try them and let me know your thoughts and/or suggestions you have for tweaking them.

Enjoy!

Kick-Off
Homemade Mac and Cheese

1 8oz packet of softened light cream cheese
1 cup milk
2 tablespoons of margarine or butter
1 tablespoon flour
3-3 ½ cups shredded cheese (cheddar or mozzarella, or any Italian blend)
1 box pasta (preferably something with ridges)
salt and pepper to taste
garlic salt (if desired)
Optional:
-1 cup corn (can be frozen)
-1 c. peas + 1 ham steak cubed (about 2 cups)
- 1 can of chopped tomatoes drained (Italian variety recommended) + 2 cups (cooked) baby portabella (or cremini) mushrooms—just cook mushrooms in 1 tbs butter and add tomatoes, for the last minute of cooking
-1 package of drained, thawed, frozen spinach + 2 cups cooked mushrooms
- For a crunchy top: mix 1 cup grated parmesan cheese and 1 cup breadcrumbs and sprinkle over the top of the pasta and place under a broiler until golden brown

1) over a medium heat, whisk the butter and flour together; after the flour is mixed with butter, add in the milk—be sure to continuously stir to prevent the milk from scorching
2) add the cream cheese and continue to stir until the cream cheese is melted down
3) prepare the pasta- drain-set aside, making sure to keep it warm
a) if you are going to add any other vegetable
4) slowly add the shredded cheese. Be sure to mix well, and keep the heat low to prevent the cheese from getting lumpy. If the mixture seems to thick, add a little milk, and keep stirring. When the shredded cheese looks to be all melted, turn off the heat and immediately pour over the warm pasta.
5) Toss the cheese and pasta mixture
a) add any “mix ins”
6) Serve hot!
7) If you want to eat it as leftovers, pout 1-2 tbs of milk onto the pasta dish and either warm over low heat on the stove top or re-heat in the microwave

Toffee Crunch Cookies


1 cup (2 sticks) butter
1 cup light brown sugar
1 cup white sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 eggs
2 cups all-purpose flour
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1 (10-ounce) bag toffee candy bits
1 cup oatmeal
1 cup sweetened flake coconut
1 cup chopped whole, skinned almonds

Oven to 350

Cream together the butter, sugar and vanilla. Beat the eggs slightly; then add to the butter mixture and mix well. Sift flour, salt and baking soda; then add slowly to the moist ingredients and mix thoroughly. Mix in the toffee bits, oatmeal, coconut and nuts.
Drop dough by the teaspoonful onto an ungreased baking sheet and bake for 15 minutes.

Vegetable Pie
- 1TB organic extra virgin olive oil
-1 c. canned organic soybeans
-1 c. organic carrots, diced
-1 c. organic onion, chopped
-1 c. organic sweet corn (1 large ear stripped of kernals)
-1 c. organic broccoli, chopped-
-1 c. organic red bell pepper, diced
-1 lb fresh organic spinach, cooked, drained and chopped
-2 cloves organic garlic, peeled and chopped
-1 tsp nutmeg
-sea salt, to taste
-ground black pepper, to taste
-1/2 c. organic pecans, chopped (optional)
-2 frozen pie crusts, or recipe for two-crust pie
-1 c. grated mozzarella cheese or cheese substitute
-2 tsp organic sesame seeds
Sauté vegetables in olive oil until tender-crisp. Add garlic, nutmeg, salt, pepper and pecans. Cook on medium heat for 5 minutes until the flavors blend.
Oven: 350 degrees for 20–30 minutes or until the crust turns brown. Allow to sit for at least 5 minutes before serving.

1) Line a 9-inch deep-dish pie pan with one prepared crust.
2) layer the vegetables with the cheese beginning with the cheese and ending with the vegetables.
3) Top with another crust, seal with a fork and trim excess pie dough. With a sharp knife, poke vent holes in the top of the crust. Sprinkle top with sesame seeds.

More Imporatant than Frizzy Hair

I had the day off today. My original plan was to sleep in, quietly relax and sip a cup of warm decaf coffee, eventually make it to the shower, to my errands, and then meet up with friends for dinner. However, plans changed. I awoke at 6am (not so much a sleep in for most, but still an extra 1 ½ hours for me). I looked out the window and saw that it was raining (grrrrr, so much for my straight hair on a day when I had time to blow dry it). I decided to go to 6:30 spin, and then came home and turned on the TV. I was so excited to watch my morning talk shows, GMA, Live With Regis and Kelly, and Rachel Ray; nevertheless, I turned on the TV and quickly remembered that today is 9/11.

Needless to say, I have been sitting here on my sofa for the last hour crying. No, not because I am missing my shows, but because I have been overcome with emotion on the anniversary.

I cannot believe that it has been six years. I still remember sitting in my 11th grade English class with Mrs. B rolling my eyes at having to write another 10 page paper (we were only in the 2nd week of school), when all teachers were called out into the hall and the class grew silent. There was an eerie silence that echoed throughout the usually bustling corridors of our suburban high school. The teachers soon returned to the classrooms and asked us to listen for an announcement over the PA system. The familiar voice of our principal came over the loud speaker:
“I would just like to take a moment to relay some important information regarding the events that have transpired over the last 30 minutes. It appears that the Twin Towers in New York have been struck by commercial airplanes that were headed for California, out of Boston.. The reason for these accidents is still not known, but an investigation is currently underway. We have also been informed that another plane crashed into the Pentagon. We ask any students who feel that they may have been directly affected by this mornings events to please come down to the guidance office and feel free to make any necessary phone calls. Additionally, the entire guidance and administrative staff is in the office if you need to speak with us. We will continue to update you, as more information becomes available. Teachers- please excuse any students who feel they need to see the guidance office. Additionally, we ask that the student body remain calm. Thank you for your cooperation in this matter.”

And the class sat in silence.

I immediately looked over at my friend Caroline, whose face was white as a ghost, and who was in the process of standing up to leave. Her dad, a cost guard reservist, was on temporary assignment in the Pentagon.

Then my mind shot to my family’s good friend who works for Delta Airlines, who was working this day, and who was based out of Boston.

Instead of running to guidance, I whipped out my phone and texted my mom. However, she said that she still hasn’t heard anything, but that Mrs. T’s husband thought she was on an southern flight, not a west coast bound flight.
The remainder of the school day was a blur. Teachers could not capture our attention, students wanted to be anywhere but class (i.e computer lab, media room, design lab, etc).
I only remember a few students actually leaving school that day, but the stories continued to roll in over the next few weeks.

Turns out C’s dad was okay. He was working offsite that morning. Mrs. T was also okay, she had been headed on a fight to Dallas. Later in the week, I heard that a boy in my sister’s class had a really close call. His dad, an American Airlines Pilot, was scheduled to be flying the plane that hit one of the towers; however, due to flight delays and bad weather, he had already accrued too many flight hours and was grounded; another pilot took the flight for him.

So many people were glued to the television in the hours, days, and weeks that followed the attacks on 9/11. I remember thinking how tragic the event was, but I don’t think that I ever took it all in and processed the magnitude of the event.

Flash forward six years. I am now here in New York, and making up for lost time. The memorial service is on every TV channel, all flags are flying at half staff, that eerie silence is hanging over the city, and of course- it’s raining.

Maybe the rain is symbolic…a way for all those who lost their lives to come back down to earth and reunite with those they left behind.

Random Info About Me

For all three of you who read this blog, here are some randoms things that you may (or may not) know about me:

→ If I could have a $10,000 shopping spree to one store, which store would it be and how long would it take to spend the $10,000?
Williams Sonoma. I could spend hours and hours there. I love odd little gadgets, unique tableware, etc. However, seeing as I have all of 16 inches of counter space (and no place to store these glorious gadgets, I’d have to say Bloomingdales….I could outfit myself and my domicile.
→ If money were not an object, what would I do with my life?
Ski in the winter, go to the beach in the summer, and lead a large non-profit philanthropy.
→ What song best describes me when I first wake up in the morning?
“Old Time Rock and Roll”
→ What place in the US would I most like to visit? Why?
Napa Valley, CA. The air is clean, you have a “change” of seasons (or at east something resembling fall, spring, and summer), you can ski and go to the beach, and the wine flows like water
→ What place outside of the US would I most like to visit? Why?
Greece. Beautifal scenery, amazing history, untainted land, finally getting to see all “the stuff” they made us study in school practically EVERY year since 4th grade!
→ Coke or Pepsi?
Neiither, I gave up soda. But back in my Hey Day, I was all about the Diet Pepsi
→ Is your calendar always on the correct month (or day, if it is a day calendar)?
Yup, all pages are folded down so I will open to the current date
→Desk: messy or organized?
ORGANIZED
→ Pet ownership – which is better? Dog or Cat?
Depends on what you are looking for. A Dog if you want to feel needed/are willing to be responsible for another living being. A Cat if you want to have the piece of mind that you aren’t technically along, but have no desire to expend much more ener=gy that what it takes to crack open a can of food and scoop the litter box one time a week.
→Are you always early or terminally late?
EARLY, it’s something that I got from both my Mom and Dad
→What is your favorite book you read as a child?
To have read to me: Old Man and the Afternoon Cat;
To read alone: Any of the Bernstein Bear book
→ Secret talent?
I can wiggle my ears
→ Favorite joke relating to my profession:
Three nurses went to heaven, and were awaiting their turn with St. Peter to plead their case to enter the pearly gates.
The first nurse said, "I worked in an emergency room. We tried our best to help patients, even though occasionally we did lose one. I think I deserve to go to heaven." St. Peter looks at her file and admits her to heaven.
The second nurse says, "I worked in an operating room. It's a very high stress environment and we do our best. Sometimes the patients are too sick and we lose them, but overall we try very hard." St. Peter looks at her file and admits her to heaven.
The third nurse says, "I was a case manager for an HMO."
St. Peter looks at her file. He pulls out a calculator and starts punching away at it furiously, constantly going back to the nurse's file. After a few minutes St. Peter looks up, smiles, and says, "Congratulations! You've been admitted to heaven ... for five days!"

A Day In the Life

I’m serious people…I’m trying hard to write more often, on more interesting topics, and (oh yes) be more grammatically correct. So here goes. Read on for how today play out for me. Keep in mind, though, that right now I’m trying to practice “The Secret
”. Despite the fact that I don’t really like Oprah/”her preachyness” (but that is an entirely different post), her latest endorsement seems to have so much potential, why not give it a try.

6am: My alarm goes off ( 1 hour and 30 minutes late). I guess I hit alarm 2 last night. Whoops. Oh well (I’m channeling the secret here). My trainer has been yelling at me that I am training too much and lifting too often, so I guess today is a good day to try something new- the 6:30am spin class.-especially since I don’t have to be at work until 8:30 am because we have a continuing education day!

6:20am: Arrive at spin class 10 minutes early, pick the ideal bike location-middle of the room, to the right hand side (no one will be looking at my but bounce up and down as we hill climb in 3rd position).

6:22am: Start warming up, hear the bike squealing and clanging. Oh well, I’ll ignore it, the music will be loud.

6:24am: Nope, this isn’t going to work, the noise is obnoxious. Take a look around the room and only 1 bike left. Yup, you guessed it. Front row, dead center! But wait!!! It’s right next to the cute guy who lives in my building. **The Secret**

6:35am: No instructor, bummer. One member of the class volunteers to lead the class (along with his REALLY bad ipod play list). Oh well. But wait!!! In strolls my ABS Class instructor (amazing motivator!) and he’s going to be the sub! **The Secret**

7:25am: Class over, amazing workout, off to the shower!

7:26am: In the locker room realize that I packed two pairs of underwear but no bra. Oh well, me and my 32 barely A chest have gone without a bra numerous times before, I’ll just throw my cardigan sweater over the shirt…it’s going to be a nice cool day, 75 sunny with a breeze. **The Secret**

7:45am: Walking down the street and I look down at my shirt. Whoops! I went shopping last weekend and bought 2 new shirts (among other things): one navy blue and grey striped, one black and grey striped. So today I took the navy blue one, but I’m wearing black shorts. Oh well. At least I’ve got the sweater **the Secret**. Even better, I have plenty of time before I have to be at work (how I love my 5 minute walking “commute”), I’ll swing home and change AND get a bra!

8:25: Hanging out waiting for my class to start, catching up on my leisure reading.

8:50: Still no teacher, weird! Oh wait, here comes someone. Crap! The instructor called in sick. This means we have to go to the floor, (ehhh, I’m not mentally prepared for a day of patient care). But wait!! They tell us that we can take the books and go read and self study (any where we want!). Me and two other nurses take our books and head to the coffee shop with the outside café (remember what a nice day it is today!!?!?!) **The Secret**

12noon: LUNCH! Shoot, I have zero cash. But wait, today is payday with automatic deposit! **The Secret**

3:45: Log onto PeopleSoft to check automatic deposit and notice that today is the deadline to enroll in my Benefits! (phew! If we had been in the classroom, I wouldn’t have been able to sneak into the library to check this out and I would have been without insurance, eeks!!) **The Secret**

3:50: I realize that I worked over 40 hours last week, plus Monday was a holiday so I got holiday pay!! Excellent!!! **The Secret**

4:45: Turn books back in, get credits for today’s self learning, head to the Organic Market

4:55: YAY! My favorite soy “ice cream” is back in stock! **The Secret**

5:30: Checking out at the market (I NEVER rush through a trip to the market, I love my time there. It’s relaxing. Maybe I’m weird, but I get lots of enjoyment perusing the isles, thinking up recipes of what I can make with the bargain Bulgar Wheat Recipe
, etc. **The secret**

6:15. I have been inline for 10 minutes, starting to wonder why we aren’t moving anywhere.

6:20 Finally check out.

6:36 Waiting for the elevator in my building (heavy grocery bags!) But wait!!! In walks Mr. Cute Spin Class Man who lives on the 5th Floor! **The Secret**

So there’s my day. Now I challenge you: Challenge “The Secret” and see what it can do for you.

Been there, Done that

I'm a little sad. No, actaully I am a little nostalgic. For the past four years, at this same tine, I have been getting ready to go back to school (well technically for the past 17 years); however, for the purpose of this post, I am referring to college.

NSO (New Student Orientation) is truly like a good bottle of wine...it only gets better with age.

As an incoming freshman, I was young and naive. I had no clue that people drank obscence amounts of potent
red juice from trashbarrel, that it WASN'T cool to wear your logo hoodie out to a party at night, or that 12 midnight was when all of the action started-not when I should be going to bed. By the end of NSO week my freshamn year (Mom and Dad, don't judge me for this; Colleen, don't let this be your role model) I had: gone out in a Toga and woke up in it at 11am the following day; drank approximatly 25 beers, 30 shots of cheap-cheap-cheap alcohol, and more *Jungle Juice* than I ever care to imagine; was no longer an "Ice Luge" Virgin; had tasted a jello shot for at least 15 flavors of jello (my advice, avoid the cherry-lime); thrown up in the bushes outside my dorm; and been 'that girl' making out with the boy in corner/on the street/on Locust Walk/in the Hallway/in my room/in his room (hey, he did turn out to be my boyfriend). Anyways,my point is that a week can change a person; nevertheless, I can say that I never sacrificed what I stood for, or compromised my beliefs.

With the three following NSO's, each one got better. It was no longer about finding the best fraternity party, but rather about hosting the best 'off campus' party. It was a time to go out and see your friends, or to drunkenly to seek out your 'frenemies". Let's just say that by senior year NSO I didn't step into one fraterniy house, but I had an experience that rivaled any of my preceding experiences.

As the last few weeks have quickly passed, the Bed Bath & Beyond/Target/Office Max/Best Buy 'BACK TO SCHOOL' fliers have cllutterd my mailbox; however, it wasn't until I got the "Welcome Back To School Message' on my old student email account that it hit me...I'm no longer a student playing nurse, but now I'm a nurse playing grownup. The more and more I thought about it, I decided I would make a "Survival Kit" for all those who are beginning their college experience.

Here's to all incoming freshaman: may all your liver's detoxify, your bank accounts survive, and your experiences be captured into wonderful memories that you will forever hold onto...

A Survival Kit

1. A Toothbrush- you’d be amazed at how thankful you’ll be for an “extra” when you accidentally drop yours on the bathroom floor at ngodly hours of the nght/early morning
2. Toothpaste- hang up posters and nail things to the wall without worry…when you go to move out, it magically fills the holes!
3. Sewing Kit- buttons always seem to come off the shirt that you were planning on wearing…the home ec skills come back instantaneously
4. Make-up Brushes- nope, not for making yourself glamorous for the 9am class, but rather for cleaning out the dust and crumbs from your computer keyboard (have you ever tried to type a paper when the spacebar is jammed??)
5. Hairbrushes- a girl can never have too many, right? Actually, they make amazing microphones for impromptu late night dance parties
6. First Aid Kit- hey, I’m a nurse, I couldn’t resist ☺
7. Pumice Stone- it’s inevitable, flip flops will become your favorite pair of shoes (for both their ease of putting on and wet weather durability) and your heels will take a beating.
8. A Loofa- the string is key, lesser chance of it hitting the communal shower floor!
9. Nail Kit- always carry it with you (Except on airplanes)…there is nothing worse than trying to sit through a 3 hour lecture with a hangnail
10. A Flashlight- when the power goes out, do you really want to be trapped without a light to drink by (I mean…study by)
11. Cough drops- close living quarters + flu season + sleep deprivation + too much yelling over the loud music the night before= sore throat
12. Solo Cups- let’s face it, sharing cups = mono…always be prepared!
13. Batteries- your graphing calculator will inevitably run out of batteries on the morning if your math final
14. Nalgene Bottle- after a night of drinking, HYDRATION! HYDRATION! HYDRATION
15. Ibuprofen- NEVER take Tylenol with alcohol, your liver will NOT like you. Pop the Advil/Motrin/Aleve
16. A Picture of Your Family- some days suck, sometimes you may be tempted to do things that are uncharacteristic of your upbringing, sometimes you just need to see a familiar ‘face’…keep it close by
17. Air freshener- I’m not sure why, but even the cleanest of people’s dorm rooms develop a funky smell…when other people come to your room, blame the odor your roommate
18. Extension Cords- in the day and age of electronics, you’ll never have enough outlets and/or they are poorly placed
19. Tea –when its too cold to go get a latte, there’s nothing like some tea to warm you up!
20. Crystal Light- an essential “beverage” mixer
21. Animal Crackers- for when you really want to bite someone’s head off
22. Disposable Camera-for capturing those candid moments and/or for the events where you don’t want to loose that digital camera
23. Screw Driver- boys love girls with tools!
24. Tissues- for saying goodbye to mom and dad, or incase the love of your life breaks your heart (trust me, it happens ☹)
25. Q-tips- I’m not really sure what their function is, well unless you have lots of earwax
26. Dental Floss- better than string, the possibilities are endless! Hint: don’t be afraid to use it with the sewing kit
27. Razors- you don’t want to be known as the “earthy girl”
28. Gum- its way overpriced in the student hall and it doubles as a method to hang up posters
29. Post-its- I swear, writing lists on paper that can be ‘stuck anywhere’ makes life seem more organized
30. An Open Mind- don’t close your self off to new experiences, don’ think that you have to be the same person you were in high school OR, conversely, that you have to change who you have been all along. Embrace what life throws your way. These will be the best four years of your life.

Suddenly In Perspective

Last Thursday, tragedy struck my small suburban upper middle class town.

Unfortunately, this tragedy seems all too familiar; it’s the sixth time something like this has occurred in the past four years.

A teenage life cut short. A family torn apart. A community rallying to lend support. The reality that each day should be lived like it’s the last reinforced to all.

Since I began my freshman year in college, there have been five other deaths in our small town.

*E.K. hit a tire lying in the middle of the road while driving home at night that sent his SUV flying into a tree and burst into flames. He was 22 years old and 1/5 of a mile from his house.

*MA hit a tree when he came around a sharp bend late at night at a very high speed. He was 17.

*J.W. was lost at the expense of an OD…the taboo topic of suburbia. He was 18.

*AB (a close friend of mine) was killed when his Jeep flipped over on the highway and was ejected from his seatbelt while driving home in the predawn hours. AB was 1 week away from his 22nd birthday.

*NT was killed when his SUV crashed into a three telephone poles while driving through the center of town 8 minutes before his curfew. He was 21, and ½ mile from his house
and finally

*AO drowned while swimming in a lake in Maine while away at football camp with the high school football team. AO was 15 and 1 week away from starting his sophomore year.

It’s truly awful that it takes such horrible events to make people realize the value of life- the joy of each breath, the power of last words spoken, that there are no guarantees, or predictable second chances.

Although I am away from home, this tragedy really struck me. AO was my little sister’s classmate,, my neighbors all-star football player, the school teachers comic relief, the town’s 6th reminder that the future is uncertain.

AO’s family relocated to our town a few years ago. They moved from a neighboring city with a marginal school system, a high crime rate, and a higher poverty rate. Life seemed to be going well. AO had amazing friends, was well liked by coaches and teachers, and the family was settling in, enjoying their new surrounds.
But everything changed in an instant.

The moment the town got word that tragedy had struck again, they went into auto pilot. Meals were cooked, ribbons were made, memorials were held, differences were put aside, and the focus was on supporting the sufferers.

The small town B.S. (politics) was put aside, pre-season sports team practices were postponed, stressing over not having finished summer reading ceased. Suddenly, life was in perspective. Girls made ribbons and organized a memorial match and candle light vigil on the high school field. Boys rallied support and raised funds to support the unexpected cost of loosing a loved one prematurely. Life was put into perspective.

Tonight was the first night of the wake. Hundreds of people gathered to mourn the loss of a life. Tomorrow AO will take his symbolic journey to the next life, but his memory here on this one will never be forgotten.

Please remember that you never know what tomorrow will bring. Give your friends and loved ones a hug, don’t go to bed angry, don’t assume that you will have tomorrow to right the wrongs. In the famous words of James Dean, “Dream as if you’ll live forever. Live as if you’ll die tomorrow.”

RIP A.O. You will always be in our hearts.

Bibbidy, Bobbidy, Boo!!!

Thanks to a marvelous suggestion, you will all have the pleasure of reading my adventures of cooking in my new "kitchen" or at least something of the sort.

All those who know me, know that I love to cook, bake, etc. My mom says that it began long before I was ever even allowed to touch the microwave. She tells me that I used to play for hours in the dirt and sand piles of our back yard, turning Frisbees into pie plates, rocks into cake decorations, flowers into vegetables, etc. However, I soon discovered that flour (the kind that "grown ups" used to bake with) was WAY more fun that just dirt and I started pulling a chair up to the counter, taking a dirty shovel and *stealing* flour from the flour jar. Dumb? Yes. Creative? Of course? But dumber was the fact that I would lie, say that I hadn't done taken anything (while brushing the trail of white stuff into the rug that trailed from the kitchen to the back yard). Oh well, no harm done. I grew up to still be a bad liar that loves to cook.
But I digress.
Anyways, my NYC kitchen is well, SMALL. There is approximately 16 inches of counter space next to an under mounted sink. <180 degree turn> A refrigerator/freezer combo next to mini 4 burner stove with built in microwave. the kicker of it all...the kitchen is quite designer- granite counters, stainless steel appliances, custom natural cherry cabinets. But more on the cabinets...thank god I really don't eat much processed food because I have 1 1/2 cabinets for food. What's in the rest of the cabinets?? I have a drawer of flatware, a canister of kitchen utensils, a cabinet filled with tableware for 12, a cabinet filled with cleaning supplies (my OCD for cleanliness plus a cleaning lady who lives to shop for cleaning supplies = more bottles of cleaner than humanly necessary), a cabinet filled with mixing bowls, vases, a pasta pot, a veggie steamer (two actually, one specifically for asparagus), two colanders (one fine, one thick), a cabinet with cookbooks, menu's, and Tupperware, and last but not least, one and half for food. Oh yeah, its important to mention that I'm 5'4, but I have 10 foot ceilings with cabinets that go to the top...case in pint, I need a stool to reach a vast majority of what I keep in these spaces.
the other night, I gave the kitchen it's first real test. Although I cook for myself most every night and make my daily lunch for work, that's a whole lot different from cooking for people (yes, plural!)
It sort of reminded me of an episode from the Food Network show, "Dinner Impossible". My challenge was to cook chicken parmesan with homemade sauce, al dente linguini, fresh grilled vegetables, and a homemade béchamel sauce for 4 (my vegetarian self excluded). I had a time line of 2 hours. I got home from the grocery store at 6 and my guests were coming at 8. (Random note, there are more fresh, organic markets here than I know what to do with. Yes, some of them are outrageously priced, but what the hell. This is New York and my friends and I are worth it. Plus organic makes *cheese* and *chocolate* seem less bad, right???)
Here was my strategy:
6pm (20 minute allotment): slice peppers, zucchini, summer squash, purple onions for grilling; dice Vidalia onion, mince garlic, chop Roma tomatoes for sauce.
6:20 (15 minutes): coat veggies for grilling with ExVirgOO and herbs; sauté the onions, then add garlic, then the tomatoes.
6:35 (15 minutes): remove chicken breasts from fridge to allow to come to room temp on counter; fix coating for chicken (bowl of seasoned flour, egg wash, bowl of seasoned bread crumbs with extra grated parmesan cheese) preheat oven to 350 and turn broiler on
6:45 (15 minutes): add tomato paste and white wine to sauce, stir, cover, simmer on low for 30 minutes; coat the chicken in flour, egg, bread crumbs.; put veggies on grill pan and place under broiler
7:00 (15 minutes): heat oil in skillet, brown chicken on both sides; place chicken in covered baking dish in preheated oven); flip veggies under broiler
7:15 (10 minutes) stir sauce and recover; make béchamel sauce with chive cream cheese and milk-stir consistently, turn off heat and cover; check veggies- wrap in foil and place back into the oven
7:30 boil pasta water; place bread in oven to warm; flip chicken
7:40 add pasta; turn off oven, but keep door closed to keep food warm
7:45 (5 minutes-I know, quite a skill): hop into shower, change into clean clothes
7:50: uncork red wine to breathe; set table (i.e. oversized circular glass coffee table) and place pillows on floor as cushions
7:58: stir sauce one final time
7:59 sigh of relief
8:00: greet guests! and pour a LARGE glass of wine

So hopefully that didn't scare all of you non cooks out there. I swear I'm not crazy. In case you were wondering, dinner was a success! Everyone was so full that they didn't even care that we didn't have dessert. However, with full bellies, a tired eyes, the guests left by 11, and I realized what a mess I had to deal with. I had washed the pans as I served the food, so they were done, but now I had all the dishes (if you hadn't noticed apartment kitchens rarely have dishwashers), and the messy stove top, and the drips on the floor, and the finger prints all over the coffee table. Now don't get me wrong, I had a lovely time, but I was really tired and wanted to go bed. However, if there is one thing that drives me crazy, it's waking up to dirty dishes in the sink and smelling the food from the night before (okay, maybe the smells thing is from waking up after a few too many fraternity parties and having a sudden recollection of just how much beer I drank the night before and smelling the contents of my stomach coming from the bathroom....too much detail? sorry) Alas, I cleaned the dishes (let them air dry), Windexed the table, and gave the stove a spit polish shine and THEN I went to bed at 12, to get 4 1/2 hours of sleep and begin my day with a good long workout.

And for all those who wonder...can you cook and entertain in a NYC apartment kitchen? OF COURSE! All it takes is a little planning, a little patience, and of course, a little creativity! (Think Bibbidy, bobbidy, Boo!- Cinderella, of course)

Thanks mom, for never stifling my desire to get into the kitchen, even if my first creations were nothing more than apple pie with whipped cream (sand with rocks and wet flour).

Who? What? Where?

I often get phenomenal ideas for blog entries during the day; however, they always seem to arrive at inappropriate times (i.e. while shaving my legs-that foamy lather makes holding a writing utensil nearly impossible; during morning rounds, especially when the med students stand there so proudly spewing back text book answers that they think will win them a gold star with the attending, only to be shot down with a, "neexxxttt"; while trying to listen to my needy/whiney friend- admit it, we all have one of them; when I want my brain to turn off at night at midnight so I can get up at 4:45; while out on a 10 mile run- for some reason carrying a pointed object while traveling at vigorous (okay, steady) speeds doesn't seem like a smart idea; etc). If you were able to follow the above, I swear I had a point with those details. Oh yes, I hate sitting here, when I do have free time (shocker!) ,and can't come up with anything (entertaining) to write about.

#1) I don't have kids whose amusing antics I can write about.

#2) My dating life is less than exciting lately, so that would be a very short, "once upon a time...the end".

#3) HIPPA prevents me from writing anything (or at least in any great detail) about the crazy stuff I see at work...one can only tell so many stories in the third person.

#4) Drinks in New York cost a fortune so I rarely have those collegiate "whoops, I made a drunken mistake" kind of stories...then again, even while indulging in those luscious (nasty, horrific, grotesque) $7 handles of gin/rum/vodka, I was still tipsy after 1.5 drinks, so I guess I'm a cheap date....Wait!! Maybe this is my solution to situation #2

#5) This past summer (while living in limbo, sleeping on an aero bed, and living out of a suitcase) my idea of a good time was organizing the closet in the bathroom; although this may tickle Martha Stewart's fancy, it scores me no points in the coolness department.

#6) After working a 12 hour shift, I say screw the bar, I have a date with my bed.

#7) Despite my passion for cooking and trying new things, my vegetarian 'ideas' don't always spark excitement to my carnivorous friends and family. *I swear, if they were willing to try dairy free, blueberry banana spelt muffins.....they would love them! (if you want this recipe, let me know).

Despite the major digressions (is this a word) in this post, initially, there was a point I wanted to make; however, at this point in time I cannot remember what it is/was/should be. So I guess if you have any suggestions on how to generate an interesting post, please feel free to leave comments!

the "Ummers" and the "Aahhhhs"

We all do it. We all have certain habits, nervous movements, trademark sayings, etc.

The first one that I remember having my attention brought to was the California Valley Girl, "Like"......
Then there was the, "Ya know what I mean?"
And the ,"Totally"
And the, "Sick"
And the, "Dude!!"
And the, "Duhhh?!?!?!?"
The, "Wasssuuuuuuppppp?"

Now that I'm a little bit older, I have grown accustomed to both watching and listening to people when they speak (I guess it's a curse of being a nurse....always looking for the disconnect between the affect, behavior, and content of peoples speech). The other night, after maybe a little bit too much wine and not enough sleep, the concept of public speaking came up in conversation with my friends. here is what we decided:


1) People don't think before they speak; they just spew out whatever comes to their mind first, thus often creating awkward pauses they people fill with, "Ummmmmmmmmm."

2) Some people, already aware of the "ummmmmm" culture, choose to use, "ahhhhhhhhh". Although they may think it sounds more intelligent, it really just makes them sound like are getting a strep throat culture.

3) Some people just have no concept of personal space; yes folks, I'm talking about the close talkers. Those who no matter how hard you try and back away, they keep coming in closer acting as if the breath of their words will make them more comprehendible

4) The victims of the close talkers are viewed as ignorant and inattentive because they would rather stand very far away and hear nothing than to risk having their personal space invaded.

Although the previous descriptions are all unfortunate, the real tragedy is when they are all combined into one. For example, the blind date from hell who begins every story with, "Ahhh, so yeah, ummm,...I have a friend that, umm yeah ahhh, who" while simultaneously getting closer and closer to your face and when you attempt to back away and are no longer within an earshot, you find yourself nodding and saying, "Yes. Okay" and then you realize that you have just agreed to go out with the "Ummer-Ahhh-closer talker's" friend.

Moral of this all....think before you speak to avoid awkward pauses, be okay with a moment of silence, and never agree to anything that you cannot hear all the details about.

in case you were wondering where I have been....

I have been, to be quite honest, very busy.
After taking the dreaded NCLEX on July 5th, I had an entirely new lease on life. I watched movies (without trying to diagnose the characters' medical afflictions), I slept in past 8am (gasp! shock!), I cleaned out my nighstand in my bedroom (finding stuff from 6th grade...my how everyone has changed), I went out to lunch and dinners with family and friends, I got really drunk one night with no intention of going out after while wearing sweatpants and a ratty shirt (just because I could), I cleaned my family's house from top to bottom, inside and out, leaving no drawer, closet, cabinet untouched, and oh yes folks....I moved to New York.

I am now an official "New Youurrrkkkooorr", but please don't ask to see my new license. I look petrified in the picture. It more closely resembles a mug shot than a glamour shot. Oh well.

I also began my new job. For months I have listened to people ask,
"Are you ready?
Are you nervous?
Are you really sure about moving to New york?"
(oh yeah, these questions ususally followed the squnity face, nostril flared look of disgust that accompanies my disclosre of working in the burn intensive care unit).

My response was always the same. "YES! I am ready. YES! I'm excited. and YES!!! If you are going to live in NY, the best time to do it is when you are young, unattached, and lookiing to have a world of opportunities at your fingertips.

The actual move itself was uneventful, aside from the $65 parking ticket. True to my anal retentive/organized nature I did not go to sleep my first night here until after each and every box was unpacked and I felt like I had some semblance of organization working for me.

The new roomate is great. The apartment is amazing. The building is fantastic... I've already met at least 5 of the dogs who live in the building (and they already know they can expect a cookie from me), and the cute man who is always on the elevator who I think lives on the 8th floor, and the mysteryious man who is in denial that everyone can smell his weed when he lights up, and last but certainly not least, I am well aware of the homeless man who wanders up and down 76th street with his shopping cart full of cans and his blissfully distant smile as if to symbolize eternnal euphoria originating from a far off planet.

For the first time , despite having "lived away" for 4 years, 3 of those off campus, I feel so self sufficient. I'm a real person. I go to work, out with friends, to the gym, sleep, play, and do it all again the next day. I get paychecks...R*E*A*L paychecks. It nice to see figures that are triple digets, even after taxes. I can come home to a freshly cleaned apartment (hey, it's not like I can't do it...I'd give Baldy Mr. Clean a run for his money) but its great to treat myself.

So this post has gone astray from where I originally intended, thus I'll sum it up fast.
I relaxed, I moved, I began a new job, and I realized that my blog was way OVERDUE for an update.

STAY TUNED!!

drum roll please.....

after 4 years, 42.5 credits, 750 clinical hours, 3000 practie questions,and 10 weeks of studying....I passed the NCLEX! Wa- whoo. It's official, K*lly S*ssl*r, R.N.

Writing the Future

Last night was wonderful. I had two of my best friends from high school over for dinner. We all went our separate ways after graduation in 2003 (SS headed to Harvard, CM headed south and then abroad to Oxford; and I went off to Penn). There were the occasional phone calls, the summer visits, the rushed holiday dinners, but really- we were not nearly as involved in each others lives as we once had been. I met SS in 1994 at swim team- the friendship was instant. I'd known CM since we were in kindergarten, but we didn't get to be friends until 1997 (I can't believe we hadn't hit off before then!).
I am truly feeling nostalgic because on Friday, our pasts will really be "in the past." SS is getting married and moving out to California the very next day. It seems so strange, but she is leaving behind our adolescence, high school "drama", college naivete, and post graduate bewilderment and she is marrying her sweetheart. I couldn't be happier for her. CM and I are also onto new beginnings. CM is leaving to go to upstate NY to pursue an internship and then hopefully land a research job, and I'm off to the city to "save lives on hospital bed at a time".
Dinner last night reminded me of something out of a lifetime movie. We sat outside on our newly landscaped backyard, drinking wine, eating an artfully prepared Italian feast (I had so much fun the kitchen all afternoon), and catching up on what has occurred these past four years. At first I thought, oh no- this is the end, but then I realized, , its the beginning of a new chapter in all of our lives...one that we can continue to "write and edit" (maybe occasionally censor?).
Yup, I think this is good. A brand new chapter, a fresh white page...

all that and a gallon of milk

I am going out of my mind here people. I have been home for 9 days. It's agony. Now don't get me wrong, I love my family, I am thrilled by the birds and greenery that surrounds me, I love taking my 85 pound golden retriever for walks (or maybe he takes me for walks), and it's great catching up with old classmates, friends, etc...but I loathe having to drive everywhere. The past four years have spoiled me. I could walk to the movie theater, the grocery store, the gap, even Trader Joe's for god's sake! But here I am, living the suburban dream, and simultaneously draining my bank account.

Today my mom asked me to run to the store and pick up a few items. I must have looked at her like she had ten heads when she asked me, but I swear she had just been to the store (and indeed she had, but she "forgot" a few items). So I climbed into the "Virgy" and drove off, only to realize that I needed gas big time. Knowing the time of day, the path that the school busses take, and the general soccer mom rush to the athletic fields, I took the cut through to the grocery store and figured that I'd get the gas on the way home...at least I wouldn't have to turn against the traffic.

Perusing the isles,I grabbed the items my mom requested: carrots (the baby ones, god forbid we not have the *diet* treat for the dog), minced garlic, hummus, eggs, blueberries, and milk. As I walked up to the milk section I was overwhelmed. I'm so used to grabbing my soy milk, that I had to glance around for the skim milk that my family drinks. So many options...Calcium fortified, Vitamin D + Calcium, Fiber plus (for milk, seriously?), Plastic Bottle, Glass Bottle, organic. I went with the organic. Then I just happen to glance down at the prices. $3.09. Okay, I guess their bones are worth it, I thought.
I cashed out, loaded up my car, and took off for the gas station (by this point my gas light was on and it was making that obnoxious "ding"..."ding"..."ding"; just in case I wasn't aware that I was running on fumes).

Apparently I wasn't the only one who needed gas, the line was 5 cars deep (oh well, if I'm going to run out of gas, this was the place for it to happen). As I waited in line I looked up at the sign, "$3.39". Holy crap I thought, gas now costs more than milk. Wait on second thought, next time my mom sends me to the store, I'm not buying milk, I'm going to a cow....and then I'll ride it home.

stuck at 144, 145

Last summer, for the first time in my college career, my parents allowed me to have my car in Philly. Maybe they were just in denial that I wasn’t coming home for the summer, or maybe they realized that they didn’t need a third car here in Boston, but either way…my trusty 1993 White Toyota Camry made its maiden voyage to Philadelphia.

This car and I have been though so much. It was/is the first thing that I really felt a sense of ownership over and the first thing that made me truly feel independent. Equally important were the lessons that I learned while driving it.

#1-the impact of an accident on car insurance (lets just say, lesson learned….1988 Volvo’s don’t dent….hoods of Camry’s become accordions)

#2- the less than happy reaction of P &S Sessler when I “got caught” riding with friends in the car

#3- the fear I held inside for 4 years about having gotten pulled over for speeding less than 5 months after getting my license (I finally admitted this to my parents the other night)

#4- gas is not cheap. When I first got my the car, I complained because it cost me all of $18 to fill my tank (gas was at an all time low of $0.98/gallon)….little did I know that 6 years later, I would be filling up for $3.44/gallon

#5- no matter how hard you try, its impossible to take off an sweater and drive at the same time

#6- you can’t trust the city, your car WILL get broken into. Use the CLUB, seriously.

#7- cars aren’t good hiding spots for Christmas gifts (for a few reasons…) a) food will perish and/or freeze with New England winters, b) fragile things break, c) little sisters always seems to look around while you leave them alone when you run into the store

#8- leather burns your things in the summer, and freezes your bum in the winter! But it’s oh so chic! ☺

#9- sticks and stone can break bones AND car windows!

and #10- it’s not worth driving over pot holes, just so you can go see the HOT guy that works at Sullivan tire….a front end alignment, doesn’t equal the cost of a date (Even at the VERY expensive restaurant)


Although I am thrilled to be moving to the big apple where I don’t have to drive (I must admit, the city and walking/public transportation has really won me over), I’m really sad to be leaving the Cam-cam behind. This just seems sort of symbolic, but when I drove the car back to Philly this January and filled up at the gas station, the odometer stopped working, as if time was to stand still. I thought that it would just start working again (maybe a loose wire) but it didn’t. I know I should have gotten it checked out, but I really didn’t know a good mechanic. Needless to say, I’ve been driving around since January with the same 144, 145 reading on my odometer. But then the oddest thing happened, as I was filling up at the gas station to begin my drive home to Boston, (I hit the reset button, out of habit) and the odometer began working. A symbolic act, if you will. Time was not longer standing still. I had been able to “freeze” my last semester as a college student, and now I am able to begin the journey into life as an grown-up.

Glimpse into Healthcare

For all those of you not involved in health care, your best bet for getting a glimpse of the good, the bad, and (oh yes) the ugly is to spent just a few hours, no wait, even just a few minutes in an ER....Here is my advice:

ER Etiquette

Don't hurt yourself.
You can't hurt a dead man.
Never yell at the nurses
Don't get excited about blood loss-unless it's your own.
Don't hit patients or doctors-unless necessary.
SEX isn't everything, but it's a hell-of-a-long-way ahead of anything that's second.
The pain will go away when it stops hurting.
A strawberry by any other name would be a heart with acne.
Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.
If nothing has gone wrong, you've obviously don't understand the situation.
He who turns to run away must first sign out AMA.
If you can keep your head among all this confusion, you obviously don't understand the situation.
Uncommon manifestations of common diseases are more common than are uncommon diseases.
Death is a severe stage of shock, or shock is a pause in the act of dying.
In medicine, always remember never to say always and never.
Everyone gets treated exactly the same in here ---until he pisses you off.
The pit is a mixture of can do, can't do, and why the hell not!
To be right is only half the battle; to convince the patient is more difficult.

*Found circulating at San Francisco

Life Size Post-It

More than anything, right about now, I would like to have a huge giant post-it note filled with "To-do" things...already crossed off.

Do you ever just reach a point in your life when you feel like you have more loose ends than you know what do with? Well for me, I have now reached that point. Seeing as I am a typical, "type A", that likes to have a plan and have everything come together nicely, these last few weeks (and a few more to come, I'm sure) have been quite disgruntling.

And just so I can vent and feel better about it all, here is my list of unsettled business...

1. Housing- I am still homeless in New York; I have spent hundred of dollars traveling back and forth to see places and yet, I am still not an inch closer to finding a home, even as the deadlines fast approached.
2. My foot/ankle....the swelling hasn't gone down, the pain has increased, and I am loosing my mind not being able to go to the gym, or even take a walk for that matter
3. My car- about 2 months ago I went out to my car after 3 days of rain, only to find 2 inches of standing water on the passenger side (front and rear floor)....well now I am still not sure where the water is coming from (although I have a hunch it's the sunroom) and I cringe at the uncertainty of what I will find in my car following each rain storm
4. Taking my boards- so yes, I still have not received my ATT (authorization to test) because my transcript wasn't sent, because there was a random $2.27 charge on my student bill from May (interesting, considering that my bursar was cut off in April!).....which penn didn't inform me of until today, at approximately 5:54 am via email
4a) the fact that I was p at 5:54 am today....let's chalk it up to an adorable but very cranky 2 year old who didn't enjoy sleeping in his new crib on vacation...but he's so damn loveable, I ‘m just shrug it off, and pray for a nap
5. Living out of a suitcase- after my dad came and took most of my stuff back to beantown on a Tuesday, living out of a suitcase until the following Wednesday when my lease ran out, and then moving into the people who I baby sit for 's house, (spending 5 days there), and then driving away on vacation with them (which brings me to where I am now) -feel like a disorganized, wrinkled, gimpy mess
6. Standing in front of the refrigerator, hungry, but not enticed or satisfied by anything. I open the door and see salty pickles (or ketchup ,yum!) but then the fresh summer berries look so good, but the idea of hard boiled egg makes me salivate, or a nice crisp refreshing diet soda might be what I'm craving, or no, what about carrots and hummus. Dammit, why do I have to be healthy...why can't I just "bend" my own food rules, and go for a real "diet break" and eat the freaking cookie
7. Humid weather....right about now my hair resembles something from the Don King family photo album
8. Getting back to MA- so either way, I have to drive my car home. It’s a good 7 hours from where I am, but there is no room for passengers, so it’s just going to be me, my car packed to the brim, and the 400+ miles of road

so I think I am done venting for now...but at least now you know what is weighing on my shoulders. Do you have any suggestions for making the little things seem more manageable?
Maybe tonight I'll go to bed dreaming of making huge check marks on my imaginary post it note. Pathetic, yes; satisfying, even more so!

etiquette

Because our fitness center was closed today, I went and used the facilities down the street. I used to be a member, so I only had to pay a nominal fee. Looking back on my membership there, I realize what it was about that place that just didn't rub me the right way. Aside from the fact that both the weights, and cardio equipment rooms overlooked busting Walnut Street, there is just too much testosterone in that place. Don’t get me wrong, its a great place, but not quite as private as my usually fitness facility.
Funny things that occur at this place:
1. People pick their wedgies while on the cardio equipment...forgetting that all traffic and pedestrian on Walnut Street have just beared (is this a word) witness to the event
2. People taking Pilates or yoga engage in downward dog, or squats with their rears facing the street (it was quite a sight with all the people joining to kick off the new year in January)
3. The boys who are more vain that the evil queen in snow white...."Mirror mirror on the wall.....who has the biggest biceps of them all??"
4. The facilities men who (while working) have been known to put down the tools, brooms, etc and engage in a workout. hey, I've got no problem with you working out, but can you not place the drill in the middle of the floor where I'm going to trip on it (when I'm in the work out zone, I'm like in auto pilot).

So here are my final thoughts on gym etiquette:


1) Please, no growling or yelling when you lift. ..you sound like you are defecating barbells.

2) Remember the Seinfeld when George empties his bladder in the shower? Do not be a George.

3) Ladies, do not be a li'l Kim. If we can see your nipples than your shirt is inappropriate.

4) Guys, do not be a Fabio.

5) keep dumbbells and other free weights in your hands or on the racks. Dropping dumbbells doesn't make you look cool and you are going to give the old lady on the stationary bike a heart attack.

6) Remember to wipe your sweat from the machines you use. They are YOUR bodily fluids and no one else wants to bathe in them

AND FINALLY.......
7) Talking on your cell phone at the gym...when there is a line 10 people deep to get on a treadmill, is it really necessary to waddle along, gabbing away? Honestly, none of us are there to listen you what you need to pick up dinner, who you slept with last night, or just how much you want to get that new Coach purse.
It's the gym people. Take your 60 minutes as a break from technology-really, nothing that interesting will happen while you widdle your waist, build your bones, and clear your mind. IF you are using a treadmill, at a speed less than 6 mph, you aren't working out, you are wasting space.

well hello mr. delivery man

Yesterday, after a fleeting moment of panic, I managed to find 18 month old Joe after he wandered away from his mother and I at his older brothers nursery school "dance party." I really didn't think much of it, all in a days work, right? Isn't that what you do for people you care the world about? Needles to say, that was the beginning of my interesting day.

After arriving home, I proceeded to witness the homeless people rip though my garbage and comment on my "wastefulness" (hey, I'm trying to move and purge my collections). Then I got a phone call back from a realtor in NY who pretty much told me that I was "too particular" for within my desired budget (so shoot me...so much for 'standards').

Then while spending my 3+ hours per day studying for my boards (I use an online question bank) my computer entered is schizophrenic mode. It starts making this loud humming, which progresses into a vibrating, that leads to the generation of heat. I've had this problem intermittently for a few months now, but I usually remedy the problem by turning off the laptop and waiting (patiently). The problem caused me so much stress a few months ago, that I went out and spend the $350 on the "3-year extended warranty, Apple Protection Plan". However, when I Called to request service they told me that its a 14 day turnout on repairs (what?!?!?). Yeah, like a college student who gets about 2 million emails (Even if they are mostly irrelevant) and who has to use the computer for school, can really go 14+ days without it. Wait, I know what you are thinking...the library, correct? I refer you to my previous post (boy it would be cool if I knew how to insert those nifty links here)...I don't do the library (although, I wish I could).

But I digress. Oh yes, so my computer was spastic. I turned it off for 4 hours, did some errands and came back...but immediately upon hitting the power button, the spasticity resumed.
Damn! Oh well, no more studying for the night. Well, that was kind of a lie...I used the book and make some review cards and learn some (rather uninteresting) information about ATK (above the knee) and BTK (below the knee) amputation management. After that fun and exciting ordeal was done, I ON-DEMANDED (hmm, I don't think this is a word) a movie, The Holiday- starring Kate Winselt and Cameron Diaz. Great movie, nice and fluffy. Exactly what I wanted.
By this point it was 12:30a.m. and I had been up since 5:30 a.m., so I went to "bed" (aka my aerobed). I'm sure that I had lovely dreams, but I don't remember them. The next thing that I do remember is hearing a VERY LOUD banging, more like a pounding on my door at exactly 8:37 a.m. After waking from my deep sleep, and wiping the drool off my face( I know, so sexy...it's the curse of still wearing my retainers to bed),
I hopped out of bed, walked to the door and said, "Yeaaahhsssss Whooo.." Before I could finish my sentence, the man replied, "Special delivery for Kelly." I fumbled with the lock and opened the door. The man’s eyes widened and he sort of pulled back in a flinching manner. “Whatever”, I thought. He thrusts the clip board in front of me and says, "sign here." After realizing that I still had sleepies in my eyes, and that I signed the wrong line, I crossed it out, signed my name again, and received the most beautiful bouquet of flowers. I thanked the man and closed the door.
After reading the card (a very unnecessary, and extremely generous, thank you note from Joe's family) and then placing the flowers on the counter (remember, I have no furniture) I caught a glimpse of myself in the microwaves reflection. and now I know why the man looked at me so funny. Ladies and gentleman, my right boob was hanging out of my white tank top.(well not really hanging, I don’t have enough of a chest for that, more like my tank top positioned below by right boob.)

Ok, Mr. flower delivery man, hope the rest of your day was good.

Moving out, and ? (up) ?

and here I am, sitting on the floor of my empty living room with nothing more than a TV, a floor pillow, a vacuum, and a rather tacky folding wood table. Yes people, it's official. I'm getting ready to move out and it sucks.

I'm amazing at the agony of moving. How I have managed to amass such large amounts of crap over the past four years is perplexing. The papers from freshman year (lord knows I wouldn't dare ever reference them EVER again...I'm pretty sure that was the year that my writing seminar professor told me that, "You have a penchant for writing superfluous nothing"- well you know what Steve, glad to know you didn't approve, but I still managed to graduate Magna Cum Laude from Penn); the incessant number of free tee-shirts (do I really need to keep the t-shirt from "beer- mitzvah"?); every card sent to me from family and friends; rose petals from the ex-boyfriend (he clearly broke my heart, so why save the reminders?); the stub from the parking ticket that I had to pay (I swear, I didn't see the fire hydrant there when I got home at 2 am); the coupons for $0.50 off a salad (like it really makes a difference when the salad comes out to $12.00...why do I get punished for trying to eat healthy); the approximately 157 recipes that I have pulled from magazine or off the computer (seriously, just who would I cook a 5 course meal for that includes everything from fillet mignon to champagne granita); and of course, more pens, pencils, markers, post-its, and desk supplies than I thought humanly necessary.

At first, the idea of packing up to move to NY seemed so appealing. I envisioned living the lavish NY lifestyle, I’d no longer be a student living off of ramenn noodles and frozen vegetables, but I'd be a *real* person, with a fancy apartment, organic foods, a job, and (drum roll please) a paycheck! However, I seem to have overlooked the process of obtaining the new lifestyle, the transition phase if you will.
Aside from my parents being amazingly supportive and making the 6 hour drive to cart all of stuff home, there were some things that would not be making the voyage back to beantown before the trip to NY. The clean out began when my roommate moved out taking our kitchen table, some kitchen supplies, a bookcase, a few rugs, etc. No big loss, I could manage. She was kind enough to leave things that were essential (a TV, a vacuum, a bathmat) hahah. The cleanout continued with first sale of my furniture. For instance, my bed . Of course, that sold super fast; however, it left me bedless. I sold them to an underclassman who moved out the end of April (yup, its now the end of May and I'm still here), so I have been lapping in luxury as I get my beauty sleep on a twin size aero bed ( a far cry from my plush pillow top full-size bed). Alright, fair enough. It's still a bed.
And then there was the futon. Now it was less than a year old, and amazingly comfortable, but in all honesty, way to bulky to move to NY, especially with the high likelihood that I'll be living in a walk-up with narrow hallways and doors. No thanks, I'll pass on attempting that maneuver. So after numerous postings on craigslist, vast numbers of emails sent to list-serves of student groups, fraternities and sororities, and yes, even a few personalized pleas to people that I knew were staying in the area next year, I finally got an offer off craigslist. The man and his son came and picked it up 2 nights ago. But to my surprise, they showed up with a hatchback, yup, a little Honda Civic. I thought, Oh Lord, there is no way in hell that this beast of a futon is getting in that little bit of a car. But I was happily surprised to see them artfully fold the cushion into the back seat and then strap the metal frame onto the roof. I hope they didn't have too far to drive. Oh well, I got my money. So now, I have no bed, no couch, and..... I also got rid of my desk. This has made studying for my RN boards a bit tricky. Sitting on the floor is not comfortable, I can't go to the library (in my entire 4 years at Penn I have studied maybe 3 times on the library....what can I say, it's too distracting, I love to people watch), and when I study at Bucks County coffee ( I end up drinking more caffeine than is healthy and last time, I was having palpitations by the end of my 5 hour study session). Alas, I have reverted to moving my aero bed into the living room, placing the pillows against the wall, and creating a makeshift lap-table/desk.
But the coup de resistance (actually, I don't think this phrase fits here, but I have been dying to use it) was when my dad drove down 2 days ago to take EVERYTHING else, leaving me with only my aero bed, some personal items/cosmetics, my bike, and some clothes (I accidentally gave him the bad with all my pants, so now all I have to wear for the next 2 weeks is shorts, sweatpants, workout clothes, and of course all of my fancy dresses...fine choices for a day of studying, or an afternoon of babysitting...whoops!). So, QUESTION: where does this leave me? Answer: Sitting on my living room floor, wearing sweatpants and high heels, eating off of paper plates with plastic spoons, watching a cable less TV, while trying to study. Oh yes, I'm clearly on my way to living the glorious NY life. :)

stuff you don't need to know, but soon will learn...

While reading a fellow bloggers posting, I was "tagged" to continue this "chain action", of sorts. So here it goes, all I have to do is tell 8 habits/things about myself...

8. While in high school, my dad and I won a tequila shot contest in Aruba. Oh yes, my mother has never been so proud. That night she got to tuck in both her drunk daughter and her laugh vigorously at the photos of her husband doing the "dollar dance" post victory

7. My sister and I couldn't be more opposite.
She's leggy, busty, a soccer star, extremely outgoing, a socialite, comes up with the best one line zingers of anyone that I know, and is a Hollister/ Abercrombie and Fitch kind of girl.
I am petite, MUCH less endowed, a gym rat, enjoy more intimate settings, a thinker, am great at sentimental BS, and am a J.Crew/Banana Republic kind of girl.

6. I am the worlds worst typer (literally, if it weren't for spell check, I'm not sure that you could tell if I were communicating in English). It's not that I'm intellectually lacking, my mind just goes faster than my fingers....

5. A dirty kitchen is my pet peeve. I can't go to bed at night with dirty dishes in the sink, nor can I relax after a holiday meal if the kitchen is a mess......now my bedroom floor, well that's a whole other story!

4. I love the "treasures" inside foods. The extra raisins in oatmeal raisin cookies, the chunks of cookie in cookie dough ice cream, the strawberry chunks in the jelly, the apples in apple pie. It's weird, I know, but who needs the outside when all the good stuff is in the middle??

3. I did a faceplant at a bar before our sorority semi formal. Oh yes, they still talk about it, EVERY TIME we go there. Highlight of that night, the "are you okay *extra* attention I got from my date

2. My best friend and I have NEVER gone to school together. We are used to existing in 2 separate worlds, but when we do reunite, we pick up right where we left off. It's amazing, its never awkward and its what has taught me what friends are all about.

1. If you listen to me speak, you would never guess where I'm from. Someone actually asked me if I went to "finishing school" to perfect my English (jeez, only at a place like Penn would you get that question). Note* All this goes to the wind, the minute you hear either one of my parents open their mouth....they “pahk thayre cahs in the haavahad yahd”). God, I hope you got that hint.

Okay, so if nothing else, you were able to kill a few minutes of your time (procrastinating some task, I'm sure) and learn a little bit more about me.

Comedy of Errors

So apparently, it’s been almost 3 months since I wrote anything.. I can assure you, things have happened since then, but I was so busy that I barely had time to jot them down. Now that I’ve graduated (oh yes, the big day was Monday the 14th), I swear I’m going to be more diligent about writing.
But, just in case you were wondering what’s been going on these past few weeks.,,,,here is my comedy of errors. I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried.
I’ll begin with last Friday (the day after Walnut Walk i.e. 40 block, 12 hour bar crawl with the rest of the drunken Penn “Class of 2007” seniors). When I returned home after the bar crawl, I noticed that my bedroom light was acting like it was tripping on LSD (come on, flash, flicker, dimly glow, flash, repeat the cycle…) Seeing as I have cathedral ceilings with fluorescent lights, the landlord’s worker crew would have to come and change the bulb. I called them , and they said they would send someone over. While I was at the gym, they left me a voicemail telling me that they were sending someone over at 11:30. When I got back at 12:30, the ladder was still set up in my room, but the worker was no where in sight. I waited 15 minutes and then the guy came back. He was in and out for the next hour, so I showered and then told them I was leaving. I knew they had keys, and that they would lock up. So when I got home at 5pm, I come in and notice that my bedroom door is closed (tightly)...it's never closed tightly, it always sticks. I just assumed that they must have filed the door and fixed it while they were here (yet another issue that I asked them to fix). But when I tried to open the door, it wouldn't budge and the knob wouldn't turn. I tried to body slam the door (highly ineffective), and called the landlord...but clearly, they were gone at 5pm on a Friday. So I was bewildered as to what to do???
I walked around my apartment and contemplated my options. I was convinced that the door was just stuck, so I walked to the boys house across the street. One of them opened the door and just from looking at me was like, "oh Kelly...what did you do this time??haha) I told them that I just needed one of them to come over and kick on my door (I was clearly in denial and thought it was just “stuck”). So my 6'’3 neighbor friend comes over and started beating on the door like a mad man. It wouldn't budge, he was like, "you must have a lock on this door..." I was still convinced that I didn't. We tried taking the knob off, but it was painted to the door and not budging. So we concluded that we had to bust down the door...10 minutes of body slamming and kicking the door (it's in a tight hallways so there really wasn't any "wind up" room with his long legs) and we cracked the door open. So I am now the proud owner of a” Dutch door"...a top 1/2, a bottom 1/2 and the handle. Apparently, I did have a lock and the repair men locked the door when they left. Now why they did this, I don't know...especially because there isn't a key whole on the outside to let me back in. I called the landlord and left a message, informing them that I was going to need a new door. Seeing it was there retarded error (Who locks a door that can’t be unlocked from the other side) I informed them that I didn’t think I should have to pay for the damages. To my disbelief, they agreed.
And now moving onto the rest of the weekend.
My family was supposed to be arriving on Sunday. My mom, her sister, and my little sister were flying down, and my dad and his sister were driving down (I needed a car to get a lot of my stuff home). My mom’s flight was supposed to leave at 11:30, but at 10 am I get a call. It was my mom telling me that my dad was throwing up and that he had a migraine and was light headed. HE tried to drive (why he thought he could make a 6 hour drive in this state, I have no idea!?!?!?) but puked before reaching the end of the street, so turned around went back to bed. He was convinced that he would try again later in the day. My mom, aunt, and sister boarded their flight. I met them at the pregraduation festivities and my mom said, “Well Kel…dad isn’t driving. He’s going to fly in late tonight. He thought he could fly in at 6am, but don’t worry, I told him he had to get on the plan TONIGHT, even if he was puking, A 50 minute flight is better than a 6 hour drive” (Gee mom, that was so considerate of you…I’m sure that all the people on the flight are going to be thrilled. Hahah Anyways, he (and my other aunt) made it into Philly late that night. I guess my dad was fine, he felt much better…
Well Monday (graduation) was amazing. The weather was beautiful, the ceremony was great, and best of all (at least for my parents) they could rejoice at not having to write any more tuition checks (at least until Sessler #2 heads off to school, haha).

There was an interesting twist on Monday evening when I lost my cell phone at the restaurant where we had dinner. My family and the two families that I babysit for (14 of us in all) enjoyed a lovely dinner, but as the kiddos got rambunctious and started to run around, my purse got knocked off the chair. I picked up , what I thought was everything, and put the purse back on the chair. However, when I got home, I realized that my cell phone was no where to be found. Shit, what to do??? At first I was like, oh, I’ll just call the restaurant and see if they found it. WAIT, that’s right, I can’t do that! I lost my phone! But seeing as I don't have a land line, I wasn't really sure what to do. I had no way of contact any of my friends to meet up with the later, and I couldn't get in touch with my parents to have them help me out. Oh yeah, there was also that detail about having to meet up with them the next day, but I didn’t know where there hotel was located. Still bewildered about the predicament that I found myself in, I ended up having to go and borrow my neighbors cell phone to call my parents and get their hotel info and have them contact the restaurant. Did I mention that I’m not really friends with this kid and oh yeah, he answered the door in his boxers (red hearts….I’m pretty sure that he wasn’t along, whoops!) He told me to take the phone and then he came down a few minutes later and handed me his landline cordless phone to keep until the morning. At least I would be able to call my parents and let them know when I was coming over.. So that would have been great, except it died after I made one call. Oh well, it was the thought that counts.
So I was back at square one.
I had briefly gotten a hold of my mom and dad and they tried to call the restaurant, but they got "fluffed off" and the girl put them on hold for about 3 seconds, said- nope. not there. we'll call you if it turns up . (My mom called back and said, "well if you are going to call us, here is the number...then she hung up, haha).
Anyways, I went to bed, miserable and stressed. I didn’t get to go out and celebrate with my friends. College was over, my phone was lost, and I had no contact with the rest of the world.
I got up the next day and drove to what I thought was my parents hotel, but there were two Sheratons (a suites and a four points...) I went to the wrong one first, only realizing it was wrong after they told me there were no "Sesslers" registered at this hotel. I was ready to cry and they told me to go across the plaza to the other hotel. When I got there, I asked for my parents room, but they said that they don't give out room #'s and to call guest services. After finally getting connected with the operator, she asked if I wanted "Paul" or "Susan". I said it didn't matter because they were both our rooms (I knew my aunt and sister were in the other). Well I tried one, and there was no answer, so I went back through the operator and got connected to the other room...still no answer. At this point, I was ready to just sit down and pout until they gave me the info. Luckily, I just happened to glance around the corner and saw my family eating breakfast in the restaurant. They all got a good laugh out of my comedy of errors, but I lost it. I burst out crying and just sobbed and sobbed. Thank god that breakfast was over because it surely was a water works display for the few lingering guests. Plus, the napkins were cloth and my nose was runny….FYI, if you ever stay at this hotel, don’t use the napkins at dinner…I wiped my nose on them. haha.

My family was great at consoling me, But then we still needed to address the issue of the phone. Because the plan is in my mom's name, technically she had to go get the new phone, but instead she called and did something, so I was able to go to the store -once I got back to campus...(yes, we have a cingular, verizon, and sprint stores on campus....welcome to the city, haha). After finally picking out a phone, I am then told that they are discontinuing that particular one and that they can't sell it to me (so I wanted to know why it was still on display?!?!). Two choices later (the man really didn't get my point that I didn't need and/or want a MP3 player and video camera on the phone) I got my phone. I went through the activation line and walked out. I walk back to my house and try and call my parents (who were now on the plane home) only to hear, "We're sorry...your phone must 1st be activated and you must accept the terms on the service plan".... SO I walk back to the store, speak with a different guy and the issue finally gets resolved. And for the icing on the cake, I called the restaurant, just to see if by some miracle the phone had been found. I explained my situation to the woman and she asked me where I had been sitting. I told her, she went and looked, and came back and said, "Yup, it was right were you thought it was... under the table." After all that!

And here I am now. Actually, as I type this the repair men are putting up a new door (speaking their broken Chinese-English…I’m pretty sure that they are making fun of me and my “special door”) so that’s what’s new with me. Stay tuned, I’m sure there are more fun times to come.

"Waiting on A World to Change"

And so the song goes....

me and all my friends
we're all misunderstood
they say we stand for nothing and
there's no way we ever could
now we see everything that's going wrong
with the world and those who lead it
we just feel like we don't have the means
to rise above and beat it

so we keep waiting

It seems like I have been doing a lot of waiting lately. Waiting for spring break, waiting to take my mid-term exams, waiting to see my family, waiting for prince charming to come along, waiting to reconnect with my friends, waiting to get a job, waiting to grow up and enter "the real world".
Yet as I watch the clock go tick-tock and as time passes by, I've realized lots of things about myself.
I am NOT the kid that I was 4 years ago...Actually, I am not even the girl that I was 3 years ago, nor am I the young lady that I was last year.
I was never sure that I would fit in at Penn. I came from a modest, upper middle class suburb, I had nothing on the elite crowd that flocked this campus. I wasn't super athletic, and surely not super popular. I wasn't one of the "beautiful people", but I also wasn't one of the slutty ones. I used to be the fat kid, it wasn't until the beginning of highschool that I learned how to really wear makeup, properly.
Before coming to college, the idea of drinking obscene amounts of red liquid from trash barrels at fraternity parties seemed absurd, coffee's addictive properties had not yet taken hold of me, nor had the realization hit that I wasn't always going to get the grade that I *thought* I deserved.
But alas, here I am, four years-a few bad choices-more than a few amazing friends-hundreds of hilarious stories- a few heartbreaks-a few less than stellar grades-and a few, okay, more than a few hangovers later.
It's weird. Now I spend more time in the hospital than I do in the classroom. About 25 hours a week, actually. Yet, what I have learned there never ceases to amaze me. Although I'm grateful for my education here at Penn (both in the classroom and on the social scene), some of what I have learned recently has given me a new perspective. I'm choosing to be a nurse, or as some of you like to call it, "ass-wiper," "vomit cleaner," "shot giver," :Fuc**** crazy person"...but I'm up for the challenge. Just as I wondered if I could ever fit in here at Penn, I sometimes wonder if I am ready for the real world (and let me remind you, the ER in NYC is way more of the real world than the popped collar, ipod wearing, BMW driving culture that I have spent the last 4 years living in). On the same note though, it has definitely been comfortable here...most common "offenses": showing up to class hungover, collar unevenly popped, being seems without IPOD on locust walk, breaking ones cellphone over the weekend during some adventure.
But I digress...Are we ready for the real world? I am going to have to go out on a limb and say yes. But not because of what we have learned in class, but because of what we have done/seen/engaged in out of class. Some of us have gotten our "ya-ya's" out, some of us have discovered the world beyond social awkwardness (some, unfortunately, still haven't- but there is hope?!?!), some of us have worked hard enough to earn our place as a "grown up" who knows how to work AND play hard, and some of us have just met enough people to get us connected wherever the future road leads....
So I dedicate this post goes out to all of us. Here's to everything we have done, and everything we still hope to do. There really is no need to wait for the "World to change" because we are the ones leading the way. Keep on trekking, never stop being who you are, never forget where you have come from, but most of all never loose sight of where you want to go.