Monday, February 04, 2008

Whoops I did it Again...

I had 11 lovely days off.

!REALITY CHECK!

I came back to work.

This is my 4th night in a row.

Our census is at maximum.

I have had 3 different patient assignments in 4 shifts.

The clerk is getting on my (and everyone else's) nerves.

Someone ate my orange from the report room.

The scrub machine is out of Small scrubs: Saturday night I wore Mediums. Tonight I'm wearing Larges. *I feel like Jared from the S*bway commercial~BEFORE and AFTER*

My Spanish (and sleep deprived brain) failed me tonight. I meant to call the baby "Guapo" (handsome), I called him "Gordo" (fat and ugly). I felt like an a$$.

While attempting do unclog a feeding tube, I sprayed myself in the face. Yum.

While changing a diaper, I got farted on. (classier word choice??)

My pen fell in the toilet in the bathroom; that's a lost cause.

Last night I chewed out a resident about the orders he wrote (or didn't write) for my patient; he begrudginly complied with my bitching; the fellow commended the residnet's"orders" during rounds...tonight the said resident is much nicer to me.

Tonight is the new intern's first night; he cannot figure out what way is up.

My feet hurt.

I really want some coffee right now.

My patients monitor is going off.

Crisis averted.

GLAMOROUS by Fergie is stuck in my head.

I'm yearning for my bed.

I was doing burn care during the Sperbowl and missed the game. Oh well, my boys blew it. Guess all those"F*ck New England" shirts around here worked out.

I've run out of things to complain about. Thanks for listening.

6 comments:

Lynne said...

Hope things have improved? Your Spanish error reminds me of the time we were at a restaurant and my husband asked for a "cocha" instead of a "coha" and the busboy gave him the big eyed look and went to get the manager!

My spelling in Spanish isn't good, but he really wanted a box, although that is certainly not what he asked for!

valmg said...

Oh my goodness Kelly! I'll probably burn for this but I almost spit my lemonade out laughing when I read parts of this.

skeet said...

Wow! That's a lot of variety packed into one job. Good for you for balancing it all out!

(Checking for typos before I hit "publish" this time, lol!)

corrin said...

You and my husband would have a lot to talk about. He's a paramedic and constantly being covered in bodily fluids and stumbling with his Spanish. :-)

Laura @ Laura Williams' Musings said...

WOW!! What a night! I hope each night is not that interesting... but it probably is because you're a nurse and I can only imagine everything you are doing. I chickened out of going for my license... I didn't like the idea of shooting people with needles.

Kelly said...

Hi all!
I must admit, a lot of my nights have some crazy twists, but I'm almost like a junkie for the obscene. I figure, if nothing else, my stories make me the life of the party!
For the record, I really do love my job....crazy patients (bad Spanish) and all!