Never a Dull Moment

Get to work 15 minutes early to do some paperwork...office is locked.

Go to scrub dispenser...out of smalls...I'm sporting the Jared from Subway "after" look tonight

Get report on my patients...hear the assignment was changed...get new report...assignment changed back...I'm utterly confused

Begin dressing changes and burn care...finish...begin charting

Charting interrupted by on call resident...I'm getting an admission...set up the room

ER calls up to give report, hangs up before I come to the phone, I call back, they tell me they are too busy to give report....right! and I've got nothing but time?!?!

Go back to finish charting..."Terminal System Error"...all my charting, GONE! POOF! Bye-Bye!

ER calls, gives me report, chews me out for delaying the transfer....uhhh, weren't you the one too busy to take my phone call?

Pt arrives on the floor, parents refusing NG tube and enteral supplements, mom whips out breast and tells me, "THIS is what MY kid will eat"

Initial wound management, skin removal, debridement, etc....

30 Minute discussion (calm and collected) about the inflammatory response and hyper metabolic state s/p burn injuries...father finally agrees to supplements...Mom and dad apologize for being edgy

Back to the lost charting...30 minutes on the phone with IT...they are useless I tell ya!

Charting..."Quick! somebody help me! Now, come soon!"...L and I leap from our seats and see the crazy (no, she is actually certifiable) lady in room *** naked, half out of bed, with all her pumps alarming and chining, tubing disconnected, her wounded extremity thrown over the side of the bed, and urine everywhere...babbling nonsensically...IV Haldol? Yup, think that's just what the doctor ordered!

But wait! What's that noise? Oh yes, the fire alarm. All doors need to closed, pt's and/or their family members sticking their heads out the doors, asking us to turn off the noise...sorry folks, I know a 4am fire alarm isn't really convenient for your sleep, but think about the poor buggers it's actually affecting...oh wait, they just announced, someone was smoking on the 12th floor. Hey pal, thanks, no really- thanks. Jerk!

"Cardiac Team 5 North, Cardiac Team 5 North"...nothing like a 4am code. Thank God we run our own codes (one of the many joys of being an ICU nurse).

Uh-oh, lady is getting naked again...lights still flashing from the "fire" on the 12th floor...pumps beeping...pants falling down...charting mounting...patients coding....

All in a day's (I mean night's) work, right?